At any time in life, whether elementary school, middle school, high school, college, adulthood, we seem to always have a ‘plan’ as individuals, a plan which almost never goes the way we want.
We have this map of our lives, sketched out and planned in detail, ready for action. We are going to ‘this’ college, declaring ‘this’ major, having ‘this’ job and settling down at ‘this’ age.
If my plan went the way I drew it, my life would look drastically different, and I am sure the same is true for most people.
I can honestly say my map did not include over half the things I am involved in now, including attending Oklahoma Christian University, and I am so glad my map did not go as planned.
But when certain things in my life were happening – when I did not get a certain job, when my plans went awry, when a friendship ended, when someone was chosen over me – I was angry. It is difficult to see beauty when things break.
I think it is a challenge for all of us to see there is an orchestrator behind even our crushed plans when we are enduring it, but looking back, I can clearly see my plans were not best.
In college especially there is this immense pressure to have your life figured out. You are transitioning from relying on your family to entering adulthood, and everything feels as though it is happening so fast – get internships, apply for jobs, keep a high GPA, stay involved, make connections, keep a social standing, know where you want to live and what you want to do.
I went to college my freshman year with expectations to stick to my map. I knew what I wanted and nothing was going to change that.
One of my favorite sayings is, “If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans.” The truth is, we can try to figure out every little detail of our lives. We can attempt to pinpoint every major decision and happening, but things will never turn out as we plan them.
Of all the lessons I have learned since my freshman year, the hardest has been to recognize my life is not actually mine. As a Christian, I have committed my life to Christ, and I need to trust where He leads me.
So far He has not disappointed me. I have held several jobs I was/am passionate about, attend a university I love and made and continue to make friendships I will never take for granted. But it should be noted none of these were on my ‘map’ or in my plan.
We are not God. We do not know what it best for us, but thank God He does. You do not need to map out your years because Your Father already knows each one. Trust Him.
Not my will, but His. Because His is always, always best.